Yeet – Happy Monday All!
So, as it turns out, my last week’s email did not send 🙁
I am very sorry to have deprived you all of such great bants (and yes, it was great) – but we’re back and at em – LETS GOOOOOO.
I am currently in Singapore airport. It’s friggen 4am. I have a 6-hour layover before boarding my third and final flight – Singapore > Sydney (8 hours).
Yeet yeet, skeet skeet (please excuse me, I am running 99% on caffeine at this point).
Airport’s bring out the worst in humanity, I am sure of it. I mean, there is the potential that it’s me, but I doubt it.
I have many issues with airports, airplanes and the other people in airplanes/airports.
- It should be mandatory to have children under 16 on a leash in airports, period.
- I am not sure how my tray table being down will affect the landing of a 80,000k kg plane (google it – man’s got plane knowledge)
- Why do people stand up as soon as the plane lands?? Y’all not getting anywhere, sit tf down – it doesn’t get us off this big metal flying box any faster ya knobs.
- Airport food – $10 for a sandwich EXCUSE ME
- Any airline that reduces cost by not paying enough rent to the airport to get a walkway thingy directly on to the plane. Nope Nope Nope. If I wanted to walk on the asphalt, I wouldn’t have bought the plane ticket m8.
- The fact that there is only 1 nap station in the whole of Changi (Singapore) airport – IT’S 4 am give a man a nap station.
- People who have loud conversations in the nap station – special place in hell for you lot.
- No gyms in airports?? This is 2k19. Figure it out.
- Why can I only bring 2L of duty free booze home?
- Not so much a complaint, but this airport has a pool & a sunflower garden. What the effing wot.
However, what I do take actual, serious issue with in this airport in particular is the marketing.
You know the types I’m talking about – the Make up, bikinis, lingerie, perfume, booze, cigarettes, beach wear, casual wear, formal wear, other types of shit for wearing (I assume).
All of the marketing I see here is created with the intention of finding, what we in the marketing biz call, pain points of the everyday person.
Then, once the pain point has been hit, it is designed to make the consumer feel bad about themselves.
The idea being to needle in on people’s shame and insecurities (subtly, of course) – and then offer forward a product that will resolve this shame/negate the insecurity.
It fucking emotional exploitation for financial gain.
Everyone deserves to feel good. To feel appreciated. To feel sexy.
They say there are two ways to create value in the marketplace;
- Innovate (upgrade/reduce pain of consumer)
Make a product that will reduce the pain the consumer is feeling. Find a way to solve the consumer’s problem, and reduce the detriment the issue is having on one’s life.
I.E. – medical procedures, sustainable body composition change (weight loss/muscle gain).
- Diversions (help consumer avoid pain temporarily)
This style of creating value is based off numbing pain. It doesn’t solve the pain. It doesn’t offer any solution to the pain coming back. It merely numbs that pain temporarily, and often ends up making the pain worse.
I.E. Holidays, a night out with friends, snorting coke off nightclub toilet bowl (extreme).
It is the sneaky marketing of the 2nd type of product here that gets me. We don’t need that shit. The human race doesn’t need that shit.
I want you to know that all I am offering you with every email, every text, every call, every wave, chat, hello, every bloomin happy Monday – is the chance to innovate.
I also want you to know that I refuse to engage in marketing that aims to turn your insecurities into a weapon to use against you.
I don’t want you to feel insecure.
I want to you feel motivated to be better.
We can all be better let’s all move forward together.
This isn’t about putting you down so you will buy something to artificially lift you up – this is just about you actually lifting yourself up.
An old favorite of mine;
‘You should be far more concerned with your current trajectory that with your current results’
OFFT, if that doesn’t give you a good old kick in the genitalia I don’t bloody know what will.
All I offer to each and every person I work with is the chance to innovate their lives for the better. This isn’t numbing any pain points; this isn’t a temporary or short term solution. This is real solutions to real problems.
What I do is help reduce whatever pain points you are dealing with, through exercise, diet & mindset. We will look at the pain points you have, embrace them, and move the fuck past them with strength and character.
We will make you physically and mentally Stronger & Less Fragile (these are not the same thing).
My ‘STRONGER LEANER‘ program kicks off on the 1st of September. If you are someone who would like:
- Gain strength
- Take control of their physique
- Feel empowered by their body
- Fight their pain points with fierce intention
- Become Leaner & Stronger in 12 weeks
- Join a movement of body confidence,
This is the sign you’ve been waiting for. I couldn’t be more direct.
The program involves:
- Weekly 1 on 1 sessions
- Group Sessions
- Exercise Programming
- Nutritional Programming
- Access to training software & tracking
- Access to Facebook support group
- End of program social event
I want you to be a part of this because I know this shit works! I have scientific, personal & anecdotal evidence to back it.
Reply to this email with the words, ‘LEANER STRONGER‘ – and I will do the rest.
Let’s go, join me.
Not leaner after this holiday lololololololol